Get mad at stuff! With me!
[singlepic id=43 w=320 h=240 float=left]Ok WORLD! I’m calling you out! Yeah, that’s right, Cozy Jamble has a few bones to pick with you! Where to start? Oh, I’ll tell you where to start:
RADIO. Here’s the deal RADIO. You stop claiming songs you’ve been playing on loop for over a year are “New Music” and I’ll start listening to stations other than NPR. Also, stop naming all your goddamn girl DJs “Kat.” I’m sick of sassy ,yet extremely boring, female voice personalities screaming their name is “KAT!” and that they “LOVE the new Carolina Liar tack!”
It is not new, and your name is Heidi. If you must DJ it up, then it can be Kheidi.
Hey, speaking of shutting up: DICK CHENEY. You are no longer the shadow President of the United States. This means I shouldn’t have to hear your speak on matters of national importance ever again.
And while I’m at it: TAZO TEA! Your Wild Sweet Orange Tea sucks! It’s like drinking warm Tang. Shape the hell up.
At this point of my rant, I will take a moment to address the problems facing the world. They can be summed up in two words: DISEASE and CAPITALISM. Now, I will fix them.
Hey Capitalism! Knock it off!
Hey Disease! I’ve been playing Pandemic 2 online and really think I understand where you’re coming from. Knock it off!
There! Solved! Blam!
And last on my agenda: MAKERS OF THE ONLINE GAME PANDEMIC 2! Your game is really goddamn addicting! I greatly enjoy it! Good work!
There, done. You may now all go back to your regularly scheduled lives. Except those of you playingPandemic 2. I will see you after I wipe out Madagascar.
Josie’s Positive Note of the Day: After playing Pandemic 2 for several days, I have come to the conclusion that if the Swine Flu actually does turn out to be a global plague and not just a viral exposé of Mexico’s health care system, Madagascar is the place to go. Way to go DJ Dictator! Please do not name your first lady Kat.